Life Suck!
It’s my story, my name is El, and I am just an ordinary person. I am 18 and the first child in my family. We lived in a small wooden house, in a small town named Sorrow. I have one sister named Day. She is 8 years old now. She is still young but brilliant. My father is a craftsman and he made all the stuff in our house by his own. He is a strong person. His hair is as same as mine, dark brown and curly. People say that we are just the same; with a pointed nose and sharp eyes sigh. I’m really proud of him, and someday I want to be like him. My mom is a maid in the Dianne house. Actually, she is the best mom in the world. She always takes care of her children even she was so tired. She loves singing, and she has a beautiful voice. Fortunately, I inherit her ability on singing.
It was another beautiful Sunday in my life and today was Day’s birthday, 28th September. It was not really birthday party actually, it just a small but special dinner. Mom had prepared all the food since this morning. We sat together in the kitchen and dad came to the room and he brought a small box, it’s a present for Day,
“Happy birthday, honey”, Dad said.
Day smiled. It’s the biggest smile that I have ever seen before, “Thanks Dad, Mom, El, I love you all!” and she kissed me.
After eating we got to sleep.
I lay on my bed, reflecting what happened in this day, gave thank to God for everything he gave. I could see the crescent pile white moon from my bed through the window. I think that this night was special, don’t know why. Then I closed my eyes.
I opened my eyes for I got a nightmare, something red try to eat me, and eat my family. I woke up and wet. This nightmare was going to be true. My house was burnt. I ran. The one I could see was my mother, she cried and scared. I came to her and we looked for Day to wake her up. When we came to her small bed, she’s not there. I was panic at that time.
“Day, where are you?” I yelled.
“Day, O baby…” My mom called her name and began to cry.
There’s no sound of Day’s. It’s getting hot there and I thought that I have to save my mom first. Turning back my body, I saw a small cupboard. But there’s nothing in my mind. Later I knew that Day was there, and I felt so sorry I didn’t check it. We kept on moving. I hope that Day had already with my father.
The room full of smog. I felt my lungs were also burnt. I hug my mom closer. We were trapped, could see nothing but smog and fire. Then everything was getting worse. I thought that we’re going to die. CRUSH! The ceiling felt down over my head.
Again I opened my eyes. I lay on a white bed.
“I’m in a hospital” I talk to my self. Suddenly I think about my family. I wonder if they are safe. Someone comes through the door. It was Cha, A woman at 30, she is pretty and charming.
“Hi El, You have already wake up. Are you ok?”
She wore a white cloth; I thought that she is a doctor.
“Who are you?” I answered with a question.
“I’m Cha, your doctor.” She smiled at me.
“Where are my dad, mom, and how about Day?” I asked her.
“I’m so sorry El, but we can only save you.”
I am shocked. I think that it’s not fair. Why did it happen? I cried.
Days in hospital, lying on my bed, was so painful. Knowing that I have no family, I have nothing remain but my life. I began to think how to get out from this hospital, how to pay the fee. I prayed and I hope God would help me. I believe that for certain.
I didn’t know how it happened, but God gave his answer. Getting better condition, I lived with the doctor, being adopted. She paid everything, I didn’t know for what reason she done that.
It was a gloomy morning when for the first time I realized that I was going to lose my sight. The accident in the burning house, bring another effect. I was so desperate, so desperate till I couldn’t smile even she tried to cheer me up. I was too sad to be seen. “I lost my family, I lost my life, and now I am going to lose my sight.” I cried in the night. It’s hard to believe in God anymore. I thought that He was playing his trick on me.
Slowly but sure, it happened. I lost my eye sight. Everything became dark. I felt that I was in danger all the time. The sounds of the world became more cynical. The sound of wind was more painful. Whispering, “It’s better for you to die!” from my bed, I could imagine the flowers insulted me, grinned at me.
I have no more hope of everything. I stopped hoping, I stopped praying. I ever think that it must be better if I ended my life but I was not that brave to end my own life. One day Cha told me that I could be cured by some new treatment. At first I didn’t response her advice; I think that it’s just a lie. No one could cure my life; no one could bring my family back to live. But she persuaded me, and again I didn’t know how she could change my mind.
The spring came, and it didn’t bring any good news. I started my treatment, but it didn’t work well. I was still not able to see. I could see nothing but the darkness. I thought that it was useless. Sometimes when I was so sad and desperate, I sat down in the corner f my bed and began to sing.
Oh flowers in the garden
Why are you so cynical?
I’m just do nothing in my bed
Why do you still hate me?
I knew that Cha was sad when she saw me in this condition. I knew it. I could feel it. One night I heard she called someone. She talked on the telephone. She looked for the information to cure my eye. I was touched, remembering that I was nothing for her. I’m neither her family nor his son but she tried to cure me, to treat me, to love me.
In the morning she came to my room, said that she knew the way to cure me. “El we can cure your eye!” Then she told me about her friend. She said that there is one way to bring my eye sight back; eye surgery.
“But we have some problem, it cost so much money and we don’t have it any” she added.
I almost cried of happy hearing her good news, but after she said the cost I didn’t imagine that I could be cured.
Suddenly she had an idea; she thought that I had beautiful voice, and for my ability we could get the money. I said yes for her advice.
Finally we recorded my voice. Trying to sell this recorder to the house production was not an easy thing. We kept on trying. We hoped that it would work well; we got the money so I could be cured. One day, I remember while we were waiting for the contract agreement, we were so nervous and afraid. I was sure that this time we would get the contract. Cha was on her duty in hospital, so I went alone to the company by taxi. She took the taxi for me. I have imagined that everything was under control till I realized that the diver is little bit insane on driving. I heard a long horn “Baaaaaam” then everything became dark, again.
Now here I am, standing in font of my grave. It’s written El Pachinno (1986-2004). Being spirit of nothing and facing that everything is just like a story tale. Waiting in a line, I don’t know where I will be taken.
Oh flowers in the garden
Why are you so cynical?
And now I dead
Do you still hate me?
Haryo Dimasto Kristiyanto
064214015
